In The Crowd, Be An Observer. Never Be A Player

what i realized, i'm stil the same old sukwai, but i do believe that i've reached to a stage where i no longer can be rescued. LOL.

i feel bad, and i feel so evil. i don't know what is happening to me.

i kept reminding myself, sukwai u gotta change. u haf to change for the better. but i just can't.. it's hard.

maybe i just need someone to slap me on the face, real hard.

i tried to be serious, to be serious in my studies. but i just can't. i've totally lost my passion in studies. i feel so dumb right now, even the simplest question i've to think twice to answer. arghh.

and i stil couldn't shut my mouth shut. i know i talk tooooooo much, and i've to learn to talk less... but i..

and i know i'm just so so childish. i get on people's nerves often. but i just...

i tend to be too proud. i tried to change, but this is me.. i just cant...

i'm giving excuses i know. maybe i need more time for myself, to learn more about myself.

life in form six is hard.

studies been superb stress and i know i'm gona struggle during my upcoming monthly tests.. but it seems as if i could care less thou i care. haha. what a shame.

the people are nice. my classmates they are fun people. i'm enjoying myself coz i've friends to laugh at and to make fun with, and most importantly let me bully her to release my anxiety. ;)

but what i'm aware; some people tend to get selfish. and have i mentioned here that i get scolded by one of the best and also the worst teacher in my school? i get scolded for nothing. i've learnt not to just do what others asked to do.. use your brain to think for every action has it's consequences. aha, and people tend to get realistic.
(p/s: and it makes me aware that i have a family to count on. they're there for me when i needed 'em most. awwww ;p)

sometime ones just have to be selfish in order to protect themselves.

sukwai, just get moving. stop procrastinating. i've always imagined myself achieving what i've always dreamt of..but now to think about it, it's almost impossible if i keep being the person i am today.

"So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us." - Gandalf the Grey {"Lord of the Rings"}